Hit the North Quality Items

Like the Graveyard Shift and Breakfast Shows after it Hit the North had many quality items in it. In fact many of their ideas for later quality items came from this show.

What Steve Had For His Tea

Here Mark and Lard found out what Steve their engineer had for his tea.

Chutney Of The Week

Lard says the name of the Chutney Of the Week such as "Apricot & Walnut". This started on the 5th May 1993 when Lard was given free rein of producing for a week therefore had control over which items went out. 'Chutney Of The Week' was his idea, taking precedence over Radcliffe's idea of 'Celebrity Bank Balance', which was to start with 'Mick Hucknall'. The first chutney was 'Hot Gooseberry' (5/5/93). This was followed by 'Somerset Apple Orchard and Sprout', a 'full bodied aromatic condiment relish spread, the ideal accompianment to mature french cheese, or perhaps blood sausage' (12/5/93), 'plum and apple' (26/5/93), 'apricot and walnut' (23/6/93), and finally 'mushroom and mushroom' (14/7/93). An attempted sabotage was made by Radcliffe, broadcasting 'Salad dressing of the fortnight' (Honey, lemon and benoline) when Lard was showing the band out, only to be accosted by Lard when he returned. They also recorded a Chutney Of The Week Song

Bez Sez

Bez from The Happy mondays helps listeners with their problems. They ask him if he can help them and he says "No". Bez Sez was later revived for The Graveyard Shift.

Where Are They Now?

Lard did a feature looking at band's past (you know the type of thing), and saying where they are now; except he always cocked it up and the bands were still playing e.g. 'Phil Collins, the caribbean drummer from Genesis'.

Tales of the Expected

A fortnightly feature with Frank Sidebottom (Pumpy Boy) not looking at the unexpected, but, as you'd expect, the expected.

Radio Timperley

Another fortnightly feature with Pumpy Boy, looking at life through his papier - mache spectacles. Timperley is the place where Frank Sidebottom lives.

Cook With Hook

Peter Hooky Hooky Hook gives a recipe for a tasty dish mixed in with some testicular references.

Hit the Sac With Bivuac

Pop group Bivuac give advice on what beds to buy.

Radcliffe's Alphabetical

Mark tells us all the cult things that begin with a certain letter. This item was repeated under the name of The A-Z of Cults on The Graveyard Shift. The text was the same but the background music was different.

TexMan Aleeto The Rat Arsed Builder

Building advice slot dealing with problems such as Subsidance. Tex drinks a load of cans and then advices you to find a builder. His motto is DIY - Don't Involve Yourself.

Chutney Of the Week, Radio Timperley and Tales of The Expected info by Chris Wyatt. If you know anything else about any Hit The North Quality Items then please email me.