Hit The North Song

Sung over the Travel Jingle

Played on Hit The North - 28/7/93
Mark: Welcome to another fabulous Hit The North show,
Both: We're back once more with cheerful chat and tunes,
Mark: And mouth watering, delicious, scrumptious cookery recipes,
Both: Utilising knives and forks and spoons,
      Well, we all agree that Hit The North is absolutely gear,
      In truth I wonder how we get away with it,
Lard: Because Scrawny boy is mediocre to the Nth degree,
Mark: And Lardy is a steaming heap of ... Lard,

Both: We are a couple of chancers,
      We readily admit,
      We abuse our showbiz chums like Hook and Gedge,
      But you seem,
      To lap up,
      This mindless tosh,
      And for our part we both get firmly wedged.

[Spoken bit during Guitar Solo]

Lard: Have you bought that, er, holiday home of yours yet?
Mark: I bought a few, what about you?
Lard: Yeah, I'm going to buy one in Wales and burn it down.
      Just for a laugh, like you know?
Mark: Get us one will you? 
Lard: I'll get you a couple if you like, just a laugh in'it.
Mark: Just a laugh, here we go, last verse.

[Singing starts again]

Both: So here we are butt naked laying our souls on the line,
      Waiting for you to give us your thumbs up,
      So brace yourselves,
      Put up some shelves,
      Dance around like elves,
      And we'll take you to the witching hour of 12.
Lard: That was alright, won'it.
Mark: Not bad, Scorpio rising.